


Despair And Hope

by Sparkuu



Category: Fire Emblem Heroes
Genre: Angst, But there’s hope at the end, Childhood Friends, vague suicide attempt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-18
Updated: 2019-09-18
Packaged: 2020-10-20 22:27:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,109
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20682929
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sparkuu/pseuds/Sparkuu
Summary: An exploration of Bruno’s spiral from his childhood days to some Book 1 events.





	Despair And Hope

**Author's Note:**

> Hi everyone! It’s been a while haha.
> 
> I’m so rusty since I haven’t written in a long while and I kind of wish I had better writing skills but this was done out of my passion for Bruno from fire emblem! 
> 
> I wanted to fill in some gabs with headcanons of what might have went down and how Bruno felt about situations he went through.
> 
> It’s so much fun to leave some things to the fans’ interpretation because I can make so many scenarios that I could fit in the story. It’s a fun experience! :D
> 
> Anyways, I wrote this at one go and I’m sick so I apologize for 1) inaccurate events 2)bad grammar/vocab. This was written in the heat of the moment.
> 
> Enjoy and pls heed the tags before proceeding!

_You’re alone in this._

It never crossed your mind that your life among your new family, the life you rebuilt after your escape, will be turned upside down in a short period of time. Despite the dangers lurking behind your every step, you kept belittling it all, naive as you were back then, and never thought it’d be much of a threat to you or anyone else.

You were wrong.

Your hands were still shaking as you pulled a weary smile at your childhood friends. She waved you over from afar, a big smile on her face as she called to the both of you to pick up the pace. He, on the other hand, glanced at you with unspoken suspicion, noticing the stiffness that took over your shoulders. The dagger held in your tight grip felt much heavier than you remember, or maybe it’s the guilt that weighed your hand down. You shook your head and took his hand with your unoccupied one, so undeserving of holding it. He seemed to relax at that, and the two of you headed towards her enthusiastic calls.

Your head was spinning.

_You almost hurt him._

You stopped training with them as much as you used to. The commander noticed your reluctance but never scolded you over it, wise to your distress but respectful of your boundaries. You were thankful to her, yet your heavy heart never stopped accusing you of using these people and their considerate kindness.

You started pretending to be fast asleep every night in your room. They used to visit you oftentimes for a sleepover or to sneak around the castle in an adventure of your own. You heart aches at the memories but your resolve, albeit shaky, decided that this was for the best. Distancing yourself from them. Distancing your darkness from them. All due to your cursed blood. 

What a distasteful joke the gods have played on you, your sister and the Emblian empire. Reduced to mare puppets that get no say in what actions they take, what words they say. No will of their own. A dreadful existence.

One night, you run away without looking back.

Your mind was reeling. You thought yourself tough and invulnerable. strong in the face of the world, in the face of your royal blood’s curse.

You kept running and, amidst the exhaustion, the adrenaline rushing through your veins, and the realization of what you’ve just done, you had a breakdown, to the point of falling ill for a week after your second escape. You couldn’t handle what you did to yourself. You couldn’t handle what you did to them. You were selfish, heartless, cruel, to leave them like this, without a single word.

A part of you was relieved to be far away. They’re safe from you now. They had a reason to hate you. They will forget about you. They _should_ forget about you. 

_You’re alone in this._

You noticed a change in you. Self-loath ate at your sanity day by day. You couldn’t stand who you were becoming, couldn’t stand the blood flowing through you, couldn’t stand the actions you’ve made. There were times when your mind was unclear, your thoughts a murky mess. Was it the curse? Was it you? Was it both?

You were too scared of the answer.

You attempted to rid yourself of this life of slavery, of the inability to control yourself. You remember planning it all out, step by step, and while getting ready to execute, it was as if something had come over you. It was as if your conscious got pushed back and your body started moving on it’s own. You heard a dark chuckle from your own lips and a promise of forbidding you the freedom to take the easy way out.

You threw up as soon as you became aware of your own body again. However, it was only constant heaving, since you kept punishing yourself with starvation and dehydration. Between the pounding headache and the noise in your head, those whispered words of your own voice kept haunting your mind for months. 

_You’re getting worse._

Your desperation drove you back home. You wanted nothing more then to reunite with your childhood friends. You’ve missed them dearly and your heart soars at the sight of the Askarian siblings facing you down. She had grown so much since then, her features becoming more like her mother’s. He had matured, face sharper, eyes focused and, as part of the Order of Heroes, he had taken his responsibilities with great determination. They were both doing well. They really were better off without you.

This. This was your way out. _They_ were your way out.

You started stitching a web of lies to accommodate your goal. You used their version of you, the one they lost many years ago, to fabricate that you had killed their dear friend. You wondered how much of your story is a lie, since you’ve never felt the same from that one incident back when you were kids. 

You watched shock splatter their confidence, watched his angry eyes, and her disheartened face. The sight clawed at your heart, a desperate cry for the kid you locked away deep inside you, to protect him from this harsh world, from your harsh self. 

You should’ve known better.

“Prince Bruno, of the Emblian Empire, I ask you now ... Are you Zacharias?”

You warned him, as your cursed blood boils. It threatened him of death, of how hopeless it was. Of how hopeless _you _were. You wish he never suspected a thing, kept thinking of you as a murderer, kept that angry fire aimed at you. It would’ve been so easy. It would’ve made your plan work. It would’ve ended your long-lived suffering.

But he hasn’t given up on you. 

And She hasn’t given up on you, as well.

You _despised _yourself at these thought. You didn’t want false hope. You didn’t want to dream of a silver lining that may never be reached. After all these years of succumbing to your fate, his words, his encouragement, his undeterred will in helping you, it somehow sparked hope in your numb heart. You unconsciously held onto every word he said. 

You reminisced on the times he took the lead, back when it was only the three of you. You remembered his warm eyes and her sweet smile. You were a befitting trio that even the commander was praising for how in-sync you all were. 

Your heart tightened, your blood was screaming in protest, and you slowly resigned yourself to this hope, foolish as it may seem.

_You’re not alone in this._


End file.
